Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Dignity, Honor, Tribulations, and Freedom.

11:26 PM by Christi Bowman

Romans 5:3-5 (KJV) we glory in tribulations also: knowing that tribulation worketh patience; And patience, experience; and experience, hope: And hope maketh not ashamed; because the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost which is given unto us.

I came to a better understanding of the meaning of these verses as I witnessed them come to life this past Monday while I worked at potty training my two year old little boy.

Tribulations are pressures, burdens, and/or troubles. As an American living with all the comforts of the first world it is hard to consider my pressures, burdens, and troubles as tribulations but that is exactly what they are, and Paul tells me to glory in them. Other translations say to rejoice in tribulations, but when I looked up glory via Strong's Dictionary I found the words dignity and honor.

The words dignity and honor conjure up a much better word picture as to how I should respond during times of tribulation than the word rejoice does. I do not know how to rejoice when I find myself under pressure, but I can choose to have dignity and honor despite my feelings.

Being a mom is one of my greatest tribulations. Mothering is not a quality that I posses instinctualy. The Holy Spirit has given me the two words dignity and honor and He has been known to scream them in my ear when the pressures, burdens, and troubles of motherhood would have my flesh respond in unproductive ways.

I have three children and I have always found potty training to be the great stressor. To say that it is messy business is an understatement. You must be willing to let your child have an accident (or two or three) while not wearing a diaper so that your child will know what being messy or wet without the protection of absorbency feels like. It also takes a lot of time, energy, and creativity to keep your curious little one on the potty long enough for him to make an accomplishment; and the drama that must ensue (over and over again) so as to ensure that he will want to return and do it again is nothing short of absolutely draining. When does a homeschooling mother of three with an extremely anal tendency for neatness and organization have time for all of that?

That being said I purposed in my heart to cloth myself with dignity and honor in all my dealings with my son that day, and God's gift to me was the unveiling of the promise that is in the verses above. Paul says that glorying in tribulations worketh patience, and patience, experience, and experience hope; and hope maketh not ashamed because the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost. To shed abroad is to spill, run greedily, and gush out.

To have dignity and honor during the times I find myself under pressure will work in me patience, and patience will work in me experience (which is testing), and testing will give me hope, and hope causes the love of God to run greedily and gush out in my heart and that is exactly what happened. As I sat on the floor entertaining my sweet little boy I saw him for the first time as God sees him. He was so sweet and innocent and full of love and I couldn't help but make myself as available to him as was humanly possible and I had for him all the patience in the world. For the first time it came easy. I didn't have to work at having dignity and honor it just flowed. I could for the first time naturally and instinctualy be the mother I have always wanted to be.

I was free!

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