Jesus

11:11 PM by Christi Bowman

My youngest was finally down for his nap, my two older girls were enjoying a movie in their room for quiet time, and I was lingering by the stove, cup in hand, for the whistle of our kettle. I waited with eager anticipation to make my tea and begin enjoying the two hours of solitude that I so desperately covet.

On this particular day my time of solitude was nearly ruined by my child's OCD, some double AA batteries, and a sound machine. As I paused for a while in the kitchen, I thanked God for the way out that He had provided and I confessed that I did not trust Him enough to be my source of strength should the day have turned out differently. This realization saddened me. I couldn't help but think of my brothers and sisters around the globe; they suffer daily in ways which are unimaginable to me and they do not get a two hour respite from their affliction. They MUST find their source of strength in Jesus and all that I really confide in is nap time. I was ashamed by my sense of entitlement.

As I continued to wait, a few of the the glorious times that I have spent in the presence of God came to mind. I have wonderful memories of parenting my children while being completely filled with the love and the presence of Jesus; it is in those moments that I remember being the happiest because it was then that I was completely free to be the parent that He created me to be for the children that He has entrusted into my care.

It was then that I realized that I don't NEED nap time or any of the other escapes that I find myself looking forward to and living for:

All I NEED is Jesus!

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