Thursday, June 18, 2009

Sinking.

8:00 AM by Christi Bowman

My husband and I did some Christian counseling in Iowa on Monday. They asked why we had come and after I told them my story they asked if the counselors I had seen here, in Illinois, had reported the abuse to the authorities. I was shocked by the question. Throughout this whole process I have never once allowed myself to entertain the possibility of prosecution.

On the same day we drove to Iowa I also received an email from my father. He had contacted my abuser. My abuser's wife denied all allegations while incriminating themselves at the same time. My parents, as usual, made it clear that they were going to believe my abusers instead of me and even allowed a friendship to reignite with them in the process.

After my father made it clear that if I could not prove any abuse then I and my allegations were worthless, I was devastated. After our visit to Iowa, for the first time, I was given hope that I just might be able to prove the abuse I had endured. My husband and I went home and looked up California law. What we found was confusing, but we did manage to get a phone number for the San Diego police department.

I nervously dialed the San Diego police department on Wednesday and they gave me the number to the sex crimes unit. I once again dialed the number. I explained my situation and was directed to a Sargent. He asked for my story and then he dashed all of my hopes; sexual abuse has a twenty year statute of limitations in California. I am seven years past any hope of an investigation.

After the phone call ended I was thrown into a deep depression. I hurt so bad. I asked God why it must hurt like this and His answer was convicting. I had put my hope in the police department. In that moment I knew what Peter must have felt like as he quickly sunk into the water as soon as he took his eyes off of Jesus. I sunk today and it has taken me a while to recover.

Labels: abuse

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